The Pak'ma'ra had recalled their Ambassador when news reached them of the attack on Narn. So had the Llort. wi
So few. ll
"I…." He coughed. "I thank you all for coming. I realise this is…. pre — empting the scheduled meeting, but I wanted to discuss a few matters privately first, to see what response we are going to make to the…. incident. We are all Ambassadors and diplomats, and our first loyalties must be to our own peoples. I would like us to present a united view to the Alliance, but most of all I would like us all to know where we stand." ob
Kulomani rose to his feet. "I am a soldier of the United Alliance," he said. "This is a meeting of Ambassadors." ey
"I requested your presence for a reason, Commander," Lethke said. "Your opinion is as important as anyone else's." us
Kulomani looked around the room, slowly and carefully. Lethke felt a chill as his compatriot stared at him. The soldier had the eyes of a diplomat. Finally, he sat down. yo
"If I may," Durano said, in his clipped, precise tones. He rose. "I received a communication from my Government moments before leaving to attend this meeting. We have only recently been able to send messages off — world. uw
"Emperor Mollari II has awoken from his coma, and looks set to make a full recovery from his illness. He has been thoroughly examined, and will begin to resume official duties within a few weeks. One of his first acts, he hopes, will be to visit Babylon Five to meet Ambassador G'Kael personally." Durano turned to the Narn. "Indeed, he has personally asked me to pass on his most sincere condolences to you and all your people." il
"Thank you," G'Kael replied, displaying no emotion at all. lo
"Is it wise for the Emperor to come here?" Lethke asked. be
"That, I believe, is what this meeting has been called to determine. Am I wrong?" yu
"Matter is simple," Taan Churok answered. "I will leave here now. All Drazi will leave. We return home, and we fight to get home back. You smart, you all fight too." sy
"You cannot do that," Lethke said calmly. ou
"We try." wi
"This cannot be resolved by war." ll
"War is all we have." Taan looked at G'Kael. "If you helped when we fought last time, perhaps you still have homeworld left. We fight and we lose. Maybe we lose this time, but we fight, and maybe others fight too." ob
"But surely a peaceful solution…." ey
"Alliance built for peace. Alliance built for good intentions. But things change. Alliance change. This not Alliance we helped create. You know this. Something wrong. Very wrong. We fight it." us
Lethke bowed his head. He had known, somehow, that it would come to this. Peace was still possible. He knew it. But he could not create peace alone. yo
"Is this a private party," said a solemn voice. "Or can anyone join in?" uw
Lethke looked up. G'Kar stood in the doorway. il
* * *
"It's beginning, isn't it?"
"What?"
"The storm."
"It has already begun. We just have not noticed it yet."
"My mother was a telepath. She used to play music for me, sing for me, old Russian songs of lost love and old Gods and the old country. My mother's dead, my country is dead, the songs are dead. I try to remember them, but they all slip away. I try to remember the names of the Gods and they…. aren't there."
"We are the Gods now. Or we will be. You are a God now."
"Me? Hah. The God of what exactly? Cynicism, melancholy and bad jokes?"
"There are worse things to be a God of."
"And you? No, forget I asked."
"I feel no shame for what I am, and nor should I. If I am to be the God of War, worshipped and feared as such, then let me be the God of War. Then no one else has to be."
"You scare me."
"Good. I should."
"And are the Gods going to war?"
"The old Gods have been at war for a very long time. We are going to end it."
"But it isn't ending, is it? It's just beginning."
"Everything is a cycle. Sometimes, to end a thing, you have to begin it. To break the circle, you have to know where it starts."
"I don't get you."
"Sometimes neither do I."
"Have you contacted your friends?"
"Yes. They are prepared."
"Are you nervous?"
"No. I am oddly calm. Are you?"
"Terrified."
"Perhaps you could be the God of Terror."
"Is that a good thing or a bad thing?"
"Like everything else, a little of both."
* * *
"There is danger. Remember." lo
Dexter reeled beneath the onslaught of sheer…. wrongness. The very air seemed thick and heavy and poisonous. Blood filled his mouth and his eyes and his senses. Blood filled his whole being. be
Talia was motionless. As he looked at her through a thin veil of crimson, Dexter thought she looked like a statue, a statue constructed of blood and pain. yu
The creature looming above her was simply looking around. It seemed to be receiving information from its senses, not the pitiful five or six that humans possessed, but hundreds of senses, every one created for a single purpose. sy
"There is danger," the Vindrizi hissed again. "Remember." ou
The words were thick and hollow and emotionless. Or perhaps that was just the way Dexter heard them. wi
He slumped forward, on his knees. This creature, this thing, this God, was so awesomely, unutterably alien. He had known Minbari, had fought against them for so long and even fallen in love with one. He had known Narns and Centauri and Brakiri. He had met a Pak'ma'ra and thought it was the most revolting thing he had ever seen. ll
But this was more alien than any of them. This was ancient and powerful and other. The very earth and air seemed to revolt beneath it and shy away from its touch. The ground beneath the Box was growing black and twisted, a foul smell rising from it. ob
A torrent of blood filled his mouth. ey
Dexter felt the creature look at him, look at him with those countless extra senses. He felt his memories being opened and violated — his mother's death, his first kiss, his first drink, cheating at cards, kissing Talia, killing Delenn. us
If he could put a human emotion to it, and he knew that even attempting such a thing was an absurdity, he would say that the creature was amused by the sheer insignificance of his existence. He was nothing, not even an insect. He had thought he was something more, something special…. yo
"There is danger. Remember." uw
When all he was was a drop of water screaming 'look at me' to the other drops of water. il
A single voice in a multitude of voices that together made up nothing more than an infinitesimal whisper in the universe. Everyone he had ever met, ever heard of, that had ever been alive. lo
They were all nothing. be
He sank further forward, smelling the foulness of his own blood hitting the ground. He felt as if his mouth were full of his own vomit, his nostrils filled with the scent of his own excrement. yu
"There is danger. Remember." sy
Head lolling on his shoulders, thick and heavy and empty, he looked up, his eyes bleeding simply from looking at the creature, at the monarch of this tiny and pathetic kingdom of ants. ou
"There is danger. Remember." wi
That was when Talia screamed, when a brilliant burst of light filled the room, and when his mind suddenly became a great deal clearer. ll
* * *
I was not there when G'Kar went to speak with the group Ambassador Lethke had gathered. Sometimes I wish I had been, but if I had gone, maybe I would never have left that room, and maybe these words would never have been written. My life is built on such flimsy and fragile choices and coincidences that sometimes I think I must have been blessed by some higher power, that my every breath is part of some grander scheme.
Then in my arrogance I stop, and realise that the same is true of every other living thing in existence.
It was not my choice not to go to that meeting. It was G'Kar's, and of course it was understandable. He was going to speak to some of the most powerful people in the Alliance, in the galaxy even. His words could affect the entire future of the Alliance. He had no wish for a child to accompany him.
But to that child, his decision seemed painful and treacherous. He had left me alone with a hard — faced, stern — looking woman called Na'Toth, who seemed too busy checking weapons and contacting ships outside the station to worry about me.
Tired and upset and a little angry, I waited in the corner of the room.
Everything I know about that meeting I heard later. I have heard some truly horrific rumours, some horrible reports.
I believe every one of them.
L'Neer of Narn, Learning at the Prophet's Feet.
There was silence for a moment as G'Kar stood framed in the doorway. Lethke did not know what to say, and he imagined everyone else was in the same position. ob
G'Kar looked…. both weaker and stronger. He was frail and the hasty bandage across his eye did little to hide the damage that had clearly been done. The effects of his imprisonment showed on his body. ey
But there was also a sort of glow on him, and his bearing radiated a vigour that belied his fatigue. Here was a wounded man, almost broken, someone who has stared death in the face and emerged with a new purpose, moving in that one perfect moment between weakness and strength. us
It was G'Kael who spoke first. He moved forward and bowed his head. "Welcome back, Ha'Cormar'ah G'Kar," he said softly. yo
If G'Kar hesitated, it was only for an instant. He bowed his head likewise and said, "It is good to be back, Ambassador." uw
He looked around the room and Lethke felt the power of that one — eyed gaze fall upon him. He felt so ashamed and weak. Surely he could have done a little more, done something, anything, to have averted or forewarned or eased what had happened. He closed his eyes, and the gaze of judgment faded, moving on. il
"May I sit?" G'Kar asked. lo
"Of course," Lethke replied. "You are most welcome here." be
"I do not think so," came the reply. G'Kar sat down awkwardly, wincing slightly. "Forgive me for remaining seated while I speak, but it is easier for me this way." yu
"Should you not be in the medical facility?" G'Kael asked. "Your wounds look…." sy
"My wounds are as nothing compared to those of our people, or of this Alliance," G'Kar replied sharply. G'Kael bowed his head, chastened. "I heard of this meeting from Na'Toth and came to express my view. Not that of the Narn people, or the Narn Government, or the Rangers, or the Alliance. ou
"I come here to express the opinion of G'Kar, a single man." wi
Lethke sat down himself, cursing his lack of courage and foresight. He should have seen something. ll
"I watched as this Alliance was born. It came about from mutual need, yes, from the ruins of Kazomi Seven and the image of a hundred planets ruined in the same way. The threat to us all was very real and very powerful and we knew if we did not unite against it we would all be consumed. ob
"Perhaps that was our mistake, leaving our birthplace. On Kazomi Seven we only had to walk outside or glance out of a window to see some legacy of what had happened there, of what our Alliance was formed to oppose. Here everything seems so far away, little more than a memory. How soon we all forget the real truth. ey
"Just as soon we will forget Narn. If some have their way, war will begin because of this, and the Narn homeworld will be forgotten. us
"The Alliance was built for peace. I believe in peace. I saw my world die, and I have spoken with those who have experienced the same thing. All are shocked and paralysed. All have different beliefs and opinions. Mine are shared by myself alone. Everyone disagrees with me, but I cannot help but continue to believe in the truth of my views. yo
"We brought this on ourselves. uw
"I do not speak of our Government. Whatever they did, they have paid for. I speak of our people. I speak of those of us who believed that we were superior and that no one else mattered, that we could interfere in the lives and homes of others at our pleasure, that they did not matter, that they could not fight back. We used this Alliance as a shield and as a sword, striking at our enemies in our ignorance and hiding behind it when they sought to strike back. il
"And now we have discovered that there are those more powerful than we are. We have learned this with great pain and great loss. It is a lesson we must not forget. None of us. lo
"We are all stronger together than we are apart. be
"Perhaps, if a better world can come of this for everyone, then those who died need not have died in vain. If we can all turn this loss to a greater good, as we did at Kazomi Seven, then we can create something greater than what was destroyed. yu
"I hope for that with all I have, and it is all that sustains me. sy
"But I doubt, truly, in my heart, that it will ever happen. ou
"What say all of you?" wi
There was a pause, in which Lethke hid his head in his hands. There were no words. There just were no words at all. ll
Taan Churok rose. "G'Kar," he said simply. "You wrong." ob
It was G'Kar who noticed the shadow first, and he turned to face the door. Lethke looked up a moment later. ey
The silhouette of the Vorlon was stark in the doorway, casting a black and terrible shadow into the room, touching each and every one of them. us
